“I have moved on” I said laughing “Ilang beses na ba ako nasaktan? I’m used to this”
“Somehow I am having trouble believing that” Patty said “Because if you really are, you wouldn’t say that, on and on, as if you are trying to make yourself believe”
“Ewan ko sayo, pero yun ang totoo!” Well, kung ayaw nila maniwala, bakit tanong pa sila ng tanong, I just said to myself. Yes, he was my first boyfriend but it doesn’t mean that it was the first time I fell in love. They should have known that!
“O ba’t nakakunot na yang noo mo” Mitchie said “napipikon ka na no?”
“kasi naman, what’s the use of asking kung hindi naman kayo naniniwala”
“Tanya, I’ve known you since High School. I know when you’re happy, when you’re sad or when you are pretending to be happy” Patty said “And clearly this is one of those days”
“Bahala kayo if that’s how you think, but I am over it! Believe it or not”
“Well, if that’s what you say”
I met Mitchie when we were in 5th Grade, she was one of the smarter kids and I was, well, one of the irresponsible ones. I have always joked that I have a Monday-Tuesday-Wednesday-Thursday-Friday sickness, I am not sure how we came to be friends, but I’m sure glad we did. Patty, or Pat as we fondly calls her, was my High School seatmate, and like Mitchie, I considers her as one of my best friends.
“so ano na? Aamin ka na ba? Pat said laughing. They know they are right and that I am still affected with what happened to me recently. I’ve broken up with my friend turned boyfriend and the sad part is, the relationship did not even last more than a month. I ended up having a failed relationship and lost a friend that is really important to me.
I met him at work. Most people weren’t surprise when we started “seeing” each other. The chemistry was always there, we would just wind up together talking about a lot of things, without even noticing that are officemates are actually looking at us, and having various discussions, when there will be an us. As quickly as it started, the relationship turned sour right after I said yes. The expectations we had from one another was too much that we hadn’t expected that it would be something we wouldn’t meet. We would fight every week, about subjects that never bothered us before. We would often question our love for one another and the fight incessantly about small things. The worst part was when we call each other names and just ended up hurting one another.
Mitchie and Patty were right. I still think of him but as much as they wanted to hear it, all I can do is lie, and hope the maybe someday, I might get myself to believe the words I constantly say – I have moved on, ilang beses na ba ako nasaktan? I’m used to this.
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